For the first time in a while, it actually probably sucks to be Tiger Woods. Consider the facts. Bad year golfing. Rumors that he is having an affair with a woman involved in the strangely-named Pink Elephant club, reported to be loosely associated with the Nightclub scene.

Then, on the holiest of days, Black Friday, a day dedicated to shopping across the  entire country of the United States, Tiger Woods was in a small accident near his gated community. Miraculously, his super-model wife (who has denied the rumors that her super-golfer husband is cheating on her) used a golf club (I imagine the couple has more than few) to rescue Tiger.

If that is not bad enough, TMZ, the always-reliable source for your daily dose of gossip, has suggested that his wife actually scratched his face in the heat of the moment in a "discussion" of Tiger's supposed affair and that the golf clubs were wielded on his SUV after Tiger was freed from the vehicle.

Poor Tiger. How can he cope? Will this ruin his clean image? Will he turn to drugs like Andre Agassi did in the past? (or even worse, grow a mullet?)We, your intrepid reporters at Rumor Report can only wait and see.