Simon Cowell is not the only foul-mouthed judge to have graced the airwaves.

I’m a little excited about this story from the UK.

Judge Jason Gardiner is not a real Justice of the Peace, but a judge on the British TV show Dancing on Ice. He was just investigated for his comparison between fecal matter and the dancing of a particular contestant on the show after his network received 443 complaints.

What exactly did he say?

Jason Gardiner said that Sharron Davies (who is a former Olympic swimmer) had a skating routine that was,

 “like watching fecal matter that won’t flush...... It goes around and around and around and in the end it doesn't go anywhere.”


OK, I’ll admit that the comment definitely did not put the skater in a flattering light, but are British broadcasting rules really so different than our own?

To my knowledge, no one has criticized any of the performers on America’s reality-based competitions in such a lovely manner yet, but is it because of any particular regulations or just fear of embarrassing the contestants? Or is it just because Americans secretly live in fear of “Focus on the Family” so much that we will never try to offend them?

Jason Gardiner was cleared by the network, who said he did nothing wrong, but of course, like Tiger Woods, he still had to apologize publicly.

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The whole incident reminds me of George Carlin’s infamous “The Seven Words” routine depicting what you can and can’t say on national television. As far as I know, “fecal matter” has not made the list yet, unless of course it starts with an “S”, which changes everything entirely.